The Swimmers – Chloe Lane

READ FOR NZ BOOK AWARDS

Twenty six year old Erin is at the bach visiting her mum who has motor neurone disease, only to be informed her mother wishes to take her death into her own hands.

Erin has walked away from a job after a failed affair with a married man and was looking for solace with her mother and aunt but is thrown into the ultimate state of despair.

I’d dyed my hair a few days before and, while the box had described the dye as ‘darkest intense auburn’, the result was more of a pink grapefruit. When I emailed my mother a photo she had responded: OH NO MY DAUGHTER HAS JOINED A CULT WHERE THEY WEAR WATERMELON HATS. Her comment didn’t really make sense, but it had deflated me. She could still be blunt – her illness hadn’t changed her that much.

Her coming to terms with the upcoming grief is of the quiet, contemplative type, combined with inappropriate actions. It is different to how grief is often portrayed but felt like an authentic response, and is just as devastating as any other more overt reaction.

It’s a book full of tough topics and may not be everyone’s cup of tea but as an exploration of deep emotion it is very moving and well written and worth reading. It’s also topical as euthanasia is in the process of being legalised in New Zealand.

Published 2021
Victoria University Press
218 pages